Friday, September 9, 2011

Dearest

I wrote this when I was pregnant with Ben. I found it during the move and wanted to share. 
Written 10.24.10

My dearest Benjamin,
It's hard to believe it's been seventeen weeks since we found out about you. I wanted to tell you about the wild ride your daddy and I have been on since March of this year. (By the way, you're going to love your daddy! I can't wait for you to meet him!)
About this time last year, your dad applied for a job with a new company. Since he didn't get it that time he decided to reapply in March. He was accepted then which meant he had to report to Maryland for training. Talk about a whirlwind! Within a matter of a few weeks, we moved to a new apartment and he was off. While your dad was in training, I was finishing up college. It felt so good to graduate in May! During training, I was able to visit your dad in Maryland and then we met up for a "second honeymoon" in Las Vegas. (You're a great souvenir!)
It was an emotional moment for me when I found out about you. I had decided to take a pregnancy test on a whim one day and, looking back, it was totally a God thing. I didn't want to tell your dad over the phone. We had planned on meeting in Florida to visit your grandma, grandpa and the rest of your family before he left for Afghanistan. I found out about you on a Sunday and we were going to see each other on Thursday. I wanted to tell him then.
My plan changed with a text message. I was sitting in my classroom on Tuesday morning when your dad texted me. My heart dropped when he said he was about to get a smallpox vaccine and he wasn't supposed to be around pregnant women or children under the age of one for a whole month. He was leaving for Afghanistan in ten days. I panicked. I ran down the hall and waited for him to call me. It was too late then. He had just gotten the shot. I went straight to my doctor to see what we were supposed to do. He said as long as we were careful around each other we would be okay. Those ten days before he deployed weren't quite what we thought they would be, but we made it.
Don't get me wrong, Ben. We were excited about you... just not that vaccine.
Anyway, we just found out that you're a Benjamin. Some of your aunts went with me to find out if you were a boy or a girl and we are all very excited to see your airplane room come together. I hope you like airplanes 'cause your daddy sure does. Benjamin Popejoy Webb. We'll tell you all about that middle name someday. Your dad has it, too. Your great grandpa is a special guy and he loves you already. I really hope he gets to see you.
You are so loved, little dude! You have a mountain of people awaiting your special arrival! Happy Seventeen Weeks!
Love, Your Mommy

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