Thursday, December 1, 2011

One Day

Please excuse me. With a heavy heart, I'm thinking out loud.

I take it back; don't excuse me... I'm not sorry for what I'm about to vent about. Because it's vulgar. And makes me so angry I could break something.

Imagine being sent away to a broken down insane asylum just because you're blind. Imagine being sprawled out in a bed, alone. The only time anyone ever pays attention to you is to change your diaper every few days. Imagine being beaten for not being able to speak. Imagine a gorgeous sixteen year old girl with designer genes left for dead in a crib designed for a six month old. 

Sick to your stomach yet? 

I could show you pictures. 
Maybe I should. 

I told someone recently that Ben has Down Syndrome. Their response? A solemn, "Oh, I'm sorry to hear that." I didn't know how to respond to that in person; so I didn't. Then I started thinking about what it would be like if I told someone I was a girl. Or that Micah had blue eyes. Or that the sun turns my hair blonde in the summer. Would they be sorry about that? Just because you're a boy, have green eyes and brown hair doesn't mean there's something wrong with you. It just means you're different than me. It means that God designed you to be who you are. He picked you to look like that. He chose to make your eyes round instead of almond shaped; gave you a pear shaped body instead of a stick figure; curly hair instead of straight. You're the only you. What don't you like about yourself? Can you change it? No, you say? Then, thank God! You're a marvelous creation and He made you that way. Be happy about it!

It seems people around the world don't share my viewpoint about differences. Just like Hitler and the Jews, people are picking and choosing who can live. Hitler didn't like Jews? We don't like babies who might be different. Sometimes not even different; just babies that don't "fit in" with where we are in life right now. 

I have a shirt that says, "Abortion: America's Hidden Holocaust." I wear it proudly. Even more proudly than I used to. Children like my Benjamin are treated indecently all over the world for simply being different. Babies that haven't even been born yet are being overlooked and disregarded for being different. Suddenly we can't be "inconvenienced" with the joy that is God's creation. It makes me physically ill to think that if Ben had been given to another family who decided an extra chromosome was one too many, he could have been sent to one of those horrible hell holes and left there. It's happening far too much and far too many places. 

I am actually quite proud to say that because of media attention and viewer outrage, several of these places that I'm describing have been shut down and the children inside have been given a chance to survive. I wish desperately that I had the power to take each one of those children into my arms and just love on them. That's all they really want anyway. Is that so hard to muster up?  

I know this post is a bit dark. Frankly, it was more for my own good than maybe yours. What can we do to help stop the insanity? I have no idea. What I do know is that it makes me hug my little guy a little bit harder. It makes me pray for those children a little bit more. It makes me all the more grateful to live in a country where differences are being more and more accepted everyday. 

One day we won't just accept it, we'll embrace the glory that is different. One day we'll really realize that normal is just a matter of opinion. One day we'll realize that children are a blessing. All children. One day the trumpet will sound and those innocent lives will never be mistreated again. One day we'll all stand before a mighty God. 

One day things will change. 


  1. I had to hold back tears...stuff like that makes me SO angry. I LOVED your last paragraph. One day, no one will ever mistreat The Lord's children EVER again. I CAN'T WAIT.

  2. Amber you are a very talented writer. I enjoy your blog very much. This post was amazing. I cried after reading it. I have a place in my heart for children like that as well. Keep writing, you bless the hearts of many and challenge us to become better people. God bless.

    Amy Perry

  3. If you love someone you will be loyal to him no matter what the cost. (1 Corinthians 13:7)

    Dearest Amber, I believe Paul most certainly had you in mind when he penned these words by Our Father in Heaven; as did God when he designed you so perfectly to carry out His plans.

    You are doing exactly what He has asked of you and have been since the start of your precious life. He prepared you along the way with the most loving and nurturing parents who raised you on the precepts of truth and love and instilled into you a deep commitment to follow Our Savior, Jesus Christ no matter the cost.

    God even had your husband already designed, the man who would be the father of your child and together you would receive him and nurture him with the same truth and love. You, Micah and Ben are His witnesses to everlasting life. You bring hope and much encouragement to those who have none. You show the world what can be achieved through faith.

    It is good to be upset, mad and torn apart by the injustices of the world. It reminds of how much more we have to do for Christ and how many more we need to reach out too for Him. It shows us the reason He came and how much He is hurting for those who have no truth.

    None of us can change the whole word at once, but all of us can change the world one person at a time. I believe you are doing just that. It seems your blog is touching hearts and changing lives by bringing hope to what might seem hopeless for some.

    Take courage Amber and keep trusting your Father in Heaven to show you more along this amazing journey. Just so you know, your words are touching my heart and helping me put things into perspective in my life. We may be on different journeys but we are on the same path to the ultimate destination.

    I pray the peace of God surround you and Micah and bless you with encouraging strength wrapped in His love. Ben is such an awesome little guy with a HUGE impact of the love of Christ. I believe your Christmas is going to be that much more special this year because of him and HIM!


  4. Amber, this post is perfect, just like your sweet little boy. I understand this all too well because of hemophilia in our family. I am going to share this on my facebook page (Bubble Wrapped Birth) so it can be a blessing to other parents of little ones with designer genes. Keep writing. You are making a difference. ((((hugs))))

  5. Beautiful, just Beautiful.... Ben is blessed to have you for a mommy...... and you are very blessed that God CHOSE Ben to be your precious sweet boy. <3

  6. Beautifully put Amber! You are blessed to have Ben and he is just as blessed to have you for his mommy. Don't ever stop writing Amber....your words make a difference.

  7. The myth of the bajillion abortion having, free-wheeling, killing fetusees on a whim, type of woman is a caricature and should never be tolerated. She doesn't exist. You cannot say all women have abortions because they don't want their baby.

    Medically, abortion is a necessary procedures in many different circumstances. Whether it's as serious as the life of the mother or because a woman just doesn't want a child, that decision absolutely has to be the individuals to make. Because I can guarantee you that none of the people who are anti-choice would want someone else telling them what to do if it were them. They can make whatever decision they want, and that's the point. It's their decision, not mine or yours or whoever. And that should be extended to everyone.

    Last, I like to remind people that they should worry about what they do with their own bodies and lives than what other people are doing with theirs. Ultimately, you're only responsible for yourself. We don't know why any individual woman has an abortion because it's none of our business. I don't want to know because I'm not in the habit of feeling entitled to judge other people's reproductive choices. There are plenty of people I think shouldn't get to have kids for a variety of reasons...but I don't get to decide that. So why should I get to decide that someone else should when they don't want to?


    Please be a true Christian and not judge other women for their hard decisions, as you don't want others judging you and your choices.

    God Bless

  9. Recognizing that one person's hard decision may not have been the Biblical or right decision, learning from that and encouraging others to learn from it is not unreasonable and is being a True Christian. It IS a VERY difficult decision when you're placed in a hard situation, but sometimes the right decisions are the hard ones to make. Jesus never said that making the right decision would be our first choice or the easiest choice.

    We have a girl in our church who got pregnant, she decided to keep the baby... her family and our whole church have been so incredibly blessed by this beautiful little girl! Sometimes the "problems" that are sent into our lives end up being the things that God wants to use to change our lives and draw us closer to him.